Whilst it seems that many relationships want to be equal, there always seems to be one party who holds a little bit more of the power than the other. You may think that this is normal, particularly if it applies to your relationship. But does this power dynamic shape the relationship? Is it a positive thing, or something that people should be on the look out for?
When a power dynamic is okay
Having one partner who is particularly powerful within a relationship isn’t always a bad thing. It really depends on the area that they have the larger share of decision making. An example of this is having one partner who works out the finances for the relationship. It may be that they have a more sound financial head, or that they are simply better at balancing money. Having them take the main part of the financial decisions makes sense and takes some of the stress out of the relationship.
The danger signs that you are in a dependant relationship
Sometimes a relationship can start off equal, with both partners taking an equal share on the decisions and parts of your relationship. A partnership is a great way to think about it. Sometimes a relationship can be incredibly one-sided, in fact, one person could become dependent on the other person.
This is not a healthy relationship to be in, and you can find yourself facing a difficult situation if you don’t recognise the signs that your relationship is dependant. So, with this in mind, we have put together some of the danger signs to look out for to show that you may very well be in a dependant relationship.
- You feel that you cannot exist without them– whilst it is a romantic idea not to be able to live without the other person, if you feel that you cannot carry out everyday tasks without them, then you may not be in control.
- You feel that you cannot be yourself– our partner should love us for who we are. If your partner makes you feel that you simply cannot be yourself, that you should be who they want you to be, then you might not be in a healthy relationship.
- They stop you seeing friends or family- there is a good chance that your partner isn’t going to be a big fan of all your friends or family members. However, if they are actively against some of the people that you have in your life. To the point where they stop you from seeing them, then this is not a healthy place to be.
- You don’t feel free- feeling free should be part of any healthy relationship. If you feel stifled, controlled or that you simply cannot make any decisions, you should get out of that relationship or make some changes as soon as you can.
Relationships should be equal, and if there is one partner who is overbearing the other one, then you are heading to a rather unhealthy place. Even if you’re just looking to have a partner for sex with no strings, it is never advisable to allow someone to control you and your decisions, or make someone the centre of your universe. Otherwise you are only setting yourself up for some heartache along the way.